Darnay's Condemnation

I went blank. I blacked out. I couldn't feel, see, or hear anything or anyone around me. My heart sank and it was as if I would never be able to love again. The pain I felt when the sentence of my beloved husband was pronounced, was unlike anything I've ever experienced. I realize now that I hadn't just gone blank, I had fainted, right there in front of everyone. People described it as looking like I had "dropped dead". But honestly, at that moment in time, I wished I had just been dead. Anything would be better than having to deal with what was just announced. I made absolutely no sound. I couldn't speak; I couldn't breathe. However, somewhere deep down inside me, I knew that it was wrong for me to react this way. No matter how uncontrollable it was. I knew that I had to be strong for my husband and not add to the misery that he is already having to endure. I was the only person who could support him during a time like this, so I pulled myself together. This thought seemed to wake me from the shock I was in and I immediately reached out to Charles. All I wanted to do was embrace him, just one last time to feel him close to me. Thankfully, Barsad was there and allowed us one last farewell before we would be separated. All I could do was think about how much I loved him and how hard it would be without him. But I knew deep down that we would be together again soon in heaven.

The Night Before My Wedding

It's the eve of my wedding day and there's a ton of things going through my mind. I'm both nervous and excited about marrying Charles. I know that he is a wonderful man and I do truly love him but there are still plenty of reasons to be nervous. One things for sure: I'm so thankful that I've had the privilege of spending several days filled with love and happiness with my father. It meant the world to me to spend so much time with him, especially before one of the biggest days of my life. It seems that he has finally begun to put his imprisonment behind him. In fact, he has even spoken about his time in Bastille for the first time. I know that opening up like this and getting over his imprisonment is going to make his life much more pleasant. A few moments ago I decided to go down to my father's room and check on him. I was pleased to find him sound asleep in his bed. This, among many other things has assured me that his is genuinely happy now and I am so thankful to know that I was a part of that healing process.

Sydney Carton

Last night something incredible happened. Sydney stopped by my house to speak to me privately. I could tell he had something important to talk to me about by the way his face changed and he seemed to be nervous. He began to tell me how he feels that his life will never get better than it is now, and I tried my hardest to convince him that he has the ability to become much worthier of himself. I honestly believe that my love and tenderness for him can save him. Then, he told me that I am "the last dream of his soul" and that he loves me and would do anything for me, even give his life. In a way, this made me sad because I knew that I was hurting him. We can't be together, no matter how much he or I will ever want to and the last thing I want is for Sydney to feel even worse about himself. I can tell he feels happy to have finally opened up and admitted his feelings to me, however I still feel sad knowing that we will never be together. His confession really touched me and I now feel an overwhelming sense of devotion to Sydney.

Discovering my father is alive!

Jarvis Lorry got in touch with me and told me that I needed to go to Paris immediately. This took me by surprise because I had no idea what could possibly be so urgent that it would call for me to be summoned to Paris. I was told that some intelligence or discovery has been made regarding my father--who is dead. It seemed so strange but beside the fact that I was still incredibly bewildered and confused,  I did as I was told and headed to Paris. Jarvis Lorry met me and after repeating his duties as a businessman, Lorry finally told me the real reason that I had been summoned here. He explains that my father, who used to be a doctor, has been found alive. He tells me that my father has been taken to the house of an old servant in Paris and that we are going there next. He says that he is going to simply identify him, and I am going to restore him to life. The news was incomprehensible. I went into complete shock. Can you imagine? Finding out your father, who you thought was dead has actually been alive this whole time?! The room started spinning, I couldn't hear, I couldn't talk, I couldn't feel. Before I could even label what was happening, Miss Pross rushed in to attend me.